"In My Head I Was One Person - In The Eyes of Others, I Was Another" - A Digital Interview With Sound Designer Thomas Ouziel
1. What is your relationship with your mixed identity?
One of the most beneficial things about growing up biracial was learning the importance of identity at an early age, and the many ways that society pigeonholes people into groups. As a mixed person, I never quite felt like I belonged anywhere - I didn't fit with the Asian groups and I also didn't really fit with the white kids. This wasn't necessarily overt (I was friendly with all groups) but it was just a deeper feeling of missing connection. The disconnect was apparent in the way I viewed myself compared to how others viewed me - I was raised mostly with French (white) culture, but everybody saw me as Asian. I was obviously aware of my Asian heritage, but it wasn't hugely prevalent in my life culturally. Being born in Paris, and my first language being French, that really was my identity to myself. Every year growing up, my family would go back to France and visit our French family. When I was there, we were just family, even though my mom, brother, and I were the only people of color. There we were, 10 cousins - 8 white, 2 half white/half Asian, nobody caring how or why - we were just family. But when I'd come back here, I was a bit lost. In my head I was one person - in the eyes of others, I was another. To be clear, this didn't result in any persecution of any kind, but it deeply informed my understanding of the divide between how people might see one thing, when the truth might be another - this definitely led me into storytelling because I wanted to understand and empathize with other experiences without assigning judgment.
As I've gotten older and had more time to reflect and explore those times, I've realized that this perspective was a huge advantage, and many other mixed people I've talked to have relayed the same idea. This forced us to dig deeper into who we were as individuals - there was no easy clique to fall in line with. It really embodied, in a tangible way, the idea that MLK put forward that people were to be judged by the content of their character rather than the outward traits we see. I think it's also important to be aware that race is not the only factor in identity. What my interests were and how people viewed me through that was also crucial. Yes, people see race and it colors their/our perspective - it's simply human nature. But you always have to dig deeper to better understand the complexities of a person, and I don't presume to know things ahead of time that I couldn't possibly know. I'm genuinely curious to learn about other perspectives from their own mouths and use the Socratic method to ask questions that not only inform me of who a person truly is, but also might help them better understand themselves.
A big positive of modern culture is that my generation and those who've come after are more equipped than ever not to let anyone thing define anybody, but let it merely be a part of the intricate fabric that makes up a person. It is something to learn from, not to judge. As an Asian boy who grew up loving the sport of motocross/dirt biking in a culture that is primarily viewed as a white rural sport, I got to see both sides firsthand - people who wondered what the hell this little Asian boy was doing at the track, as well as people who never thought to second guess it and welcomed us with open arms. I think it's important to both be wary of how race plays a part in our everyday lives, but also to remember that the majority of people are good people, and many are just ignorant of a diverse experience. We've seen countless examples of religious families who are utterly against homosexuality until they find out somebody they love is a part of that community, or people who are racist against a certain type of people until they get to know somebody of that race and realize they're just people who like to enjoy life, laugh, and be there for those they care about - they're universal traits of humanity, no matter what culture they come from. As a mixed person, you're forced to feel this firsthand your whole life, and it's important for us not to demonize people who haven't had this experience, but to help inform them of this rather than to judge. There are obviously those who's prejudices are so deeply ingrained that they can't be helped, but for the most part, I think people just need exposure to ideas and perspectives they've never dealt with or even contemplated. That is the power of storytelling, and why I've always been drawn to it, and why art is an integral part of the human cultural experience.
2. How has that relationship affected your work?
As somebody who works in storytelling, my life experience has been a crucial component. In order to be effective, you have to understand the truth of a person, even when you disagree with what they're doing. It's a blessing, because it's an opportunity to constantly engage with differing perspectives, even ones that might be disturbing to me. If you're working on a movie about a morally questionable individual, how do you do justice to that experience without glorifying it? Hopefully, the writing and directing takes that in a direction that is honest and contemplative, but no matter the style, it's my job to make it feel believable. But in general, I was drawn to this work because it allows me to explore humanity and all its facets, whether positive or negative, and it's a very rewarding part of both film and music.
3. What has been your experience with navigating the sound/film world as a mixed person of color?
Luckily we live in a generation where people are incredibly open to all kinds of people and backgrounds, so there hasn't been any discrimination that I'm aware of (especially in a city like LA, that is almost defined by its multiculturalism). In fact, it has been a positive for me; it allows me to connect to all kinds of people because I'm looking to connect with ideas and themes that are important to them, regardless of their background. Obviously, their own identities influence what might be interesting to them, but as far as my relationship with them, it has been very positive and allowed for a vast wealth of experiences of all kinds.
4. Your studio, MelodyGun’s tagline is, “Using sound as a weapon”, can you elaborate on what that means?
The idea behind it was to do sound work that is bold - not shying away from using sound to its fullest potential by really integrating the sound department as a key crew in the development of the project. By doing that we can maximize its impact and use it as a weapon to elevate the project rather than as patchwork.
Audio is a very abstract art in that it all lives in an unknown ethereal sonic space, so at MelodyGun we think of it as one of the most integral subconscious parts of the cinematic experience. Using 'sound as a weapon' means maximizing our toolset to tell the story at hand to work in concert with the vision of the director. A scene's entire mood can change just by choosing a very light, soft wispy wind compared to a very cold and hectic wind, or by adding a clock to the silence of a scene, or a siren heard in the distance just sitting on the winds of a desolate landscape etc. Another great example that we always bring up to filmmakers is how you can use sound during the end credits to make it a continuation of the story and the experience - instead of just jumping into a song or score, maybe we want to sit in the atmosphere and reflect for a bit on the story we just experienced. And maybe you want to jump right into a fun space, and a pop song is exactly the right move! The point being, the sonic experience can drastically change the emotional experience, so we always want it to be a choice we discussed and explored to make sure we’re keeping the audience in the headspace we want.
When it works well you never realize those decisions were ever made, they just feel right - but they make all the difference in losing yourself in the world of the story and the characters and feeling their experiences. It's a wonderful part of the process because once we talk to the director about their vision for each scene of the film, it allows us a lot of creative freedom to achieve the desired feeling. They usually can tell instinctively if what we've done is working or not, but many times the elements that get it to work is a magical mystery to them.
5. What has your journey in growing a company and in being a co-founder of MelodyGun?
It has been quite a journey - when I first got out of film school with a Sound Design emphasis from Chapman University, I gained a ton of experience as a freelancer, working with veteran talents of my field such as the sound designers of the Matrix (Dane Davis), and of It (Paul Hackner), where I really got to learn the workflow of bigger professional projects and see what it took to make it in this industry. Then one of the early films I worked on out of college was with Hamed Hokamzadeh and we clicked immediately. We continued to work on projects together and it was nice to be able to throw ideas off one another. One day he pitched me the idea of forming a studio and asked if I wanted to lead the post sound department, and then it was off to the races. Since then we’ve been very lucky to be able to grow the team and work with some amazing people, which we’re really grateful for.
Over the years, Hamed and I have formed a very close working relationship as business partners and friends. We have very complementary perspectives and skillsets which has been invaluable in expanding the studio, and does feel like an extension of growing up feeling a bit like a fish out of water and having to mold yourself to circumstance. As an Iranian-American, he also had to deal with similar questions of identity, so we both are eager to listen, learn and adapt as situations, budgets, etc all change around us. He's also just a great person who's fun as hell to hang out with, so that's a bonus!
We just upgraded our facility in Hollywood, near the Paramount lot, inside the Hollywood Production Center and have grown from music and post-sound work to also servicing on-set sound and audio drama/podcast production
6. How do you tell a story through sound?
Sound is everywhere around us at all times. Even if you're in a quiet room, I'm sure if you sit there long enough you'll be able to start pinpointing the various sounds that make up the illusion of silence. The distant traffic, the buzz of a light, the soft thrumming of the crickets on a warm peaceful summer night. All these sounds work through our subconscious and filter into our experiences and feelings. So with filmmaking, that's where we start - where are we, what do we want the audience to feel, who's perspective are we in? Let's say the character is on a street in LA with traffic going by - if we choose to hear all these loud cars whooshing by, that certainly gives you a certain visceral sense of energy and chaos. If we choose to hear just a soft wind on top of this chaotic visual energy, the feeling might be more akin to isolation and loneliness. There aren't really any right or wrong decisions - they could both work - but what is the vision we're trying to achieve? These conversations are all so fun and allow us to delve back into why we fell in love with storytelling to begin with - human psychology, character and theme.
Music operates in a similar sonic space, but also has a totally separate and abstract relationship. What I love about writing music is that I can let the music find itself - I tend not to go in with a structure in mind, but rather want to see how my intuition reacts to the sonic experimentation we're doing. I think every musician will tell you that part of what they love about the process is knowing which direction you're heading, but not necessarily the destination. That sense of freedom is quite liberating and can allow for your unique voice to shine through. I'd much rather hear and make something interesting and uniquely personal than a more generic pop song that uses all the cool sounds of today, but has nothing much to say. At the same time, I'm not a fan at all of saying someone's music is bad or whatever - you have to understand the context of what they were trying to achieve, and maybe it's just not for me. If they're doing the art they want to do, and people are responding to it, even if it's just a handful of people, then it's a success in my book.
7. Do you have any advice for fellow mixed-race creatives?
My advice would simply be to be yourself, be curious, be adaptable and be open to other perspectives. It's really hard to beat MLK's advice to judge people by the content of their character, although if I could amend it, I would try not to lead with judgement at all. Seek understanding first and foremost. As our fellow mixed-race compatriot, Bruce Lee, taught - "Be like water" - Be adaptable so you will never be a victim of circumstance, your potential is up to you. The last thing would be to lose yourself in the thing you love to do and work your butt off. There is no magic to becoming great at something - it takes a combination of talent and tenacity to make the practice you put in culminate in success down the road.